Examining The Empathy Trap Book 3

This is one post in a series about The Empathy Trap Book by Dr Jane McGregor and Tim McGregor. Unless stated otherwise all quotes used here are from that book. It is recommended that the series be read in order from the first post on. 

After taking great care to define the three key terms of empath, apath and sociopath the authors dove into the interactions of the three.

 "The sociopathic transaction

Often empaths are targeted by sociopaths because they pose the greatest threat. The empath is usually the first to detect that something is not right and express what he or she senses. As a consequence, the empath is both the sociopath's number one foe and a source of attraction; the empath's responses and actions provide excellent entertainment for a bored and listless sociopath going about her daily business."

 (page 44)

 "The world of the empath is not for the fainthearted, and it is easy to see why others walk away from these kinds of confrontational situations. In the context that we are discussing, empaths often find themselves up against not only the sociopath but quite often a flock of apaths as well. Apaths hide among the 60 per cent of people who obediently follow the leader. On the basis of these traits they are afforded pole position in the sociopath's intrigues. But this prime spot comes at a price, for in what we call the sociopathic transaction, the apath makes an unspoken Faustian pact with the sociopath, and then passively (often through fear) or otherwise, participates in his cruel sport.

The Sociopath-Empath-Apath Triad

For a sociopathic transaction to be effective it requires the following threesome: a sociopath, an empath and an apath. We call this the Sociopath-Empath-Apath Triad - SEAT for short. The usual set-up goes something like this: the empath is forced to make a stand on seeing the sociopath say or do something underhand. The empath challenges the sociopath, who straight away throws others off the scent and shifts the blame on to the empath. The empath becomes an object of abuse when the apath corroborates the sociopath's perspective. Ultimately the situation usually ends badly for the empath, and sometimes also for the apath (If his conscience comes back to haunt him or subsequently he becomes an object of abuse himself). Frustratingly, however, the sociopath often gets off scot free.

Sociopaths rarely vary this tried and tested formula because it virtually guarantees them success. In fact, in almost every sociopathic interaction we know of, this interpersonal exchange is enacted. The sociopathic transaction relies heavily on the apathy of those close to the event or situation and highlights the importance of the apath in the transaction." (page 45)

 "Sociopaths draw in apaths by numerous means: flattery, bribery, disorienting them with lies. A sociopath will go to any lengths to win her game." (page 46)