Freeing The Mind To Doubt
I realized after leaving Scientology way , way back in the mists of time ( 2014 ) that some key choices and opportunities progressively opened the door to the key moment when I broke down after 25 years in the cult and was willing to look at everything in my life without bias and decided to include Scientology and Hubbard which for so many years I had automatically considered beyond doubt and as a given correct and beneficial beyond any sane question . I realized I was deciding to look at everything then feeling pride in being a Scientologist and learning the " wisdom " of Scientology and love for Hubbard all linked together for comfort and certainty instead of really looking and that was not truly looking at everything so I turned my critical thinking on the tiniest bit and brought back suppressed dissonance and anxiety that had been buried in trance logic and projected onto " wogs " and used to justify elitism and narcissism for decades .
Several things that helped me are detailed in a Million Years in Hell : http://www.forum.exscn.net/showthrea...-YEARS-IN-HELL
I here want to bring up some details that I now see as helping me bit by bit break the Adamantium wall of my own closed mind . I think any detail may click for a lurker or a family member seeking an effective intervention . You never know what fits a person's particular situation until you try . And I want you to try if it is the right thing for you to do .
Something that also helped was that I had for months been getting the trances I was addicted to by " clearing " many , many words on my phone and looking up long lists of unusual and specialized words and their derivations . This served to let me gradually see that lots of " word clearing " was exhausting mentally and physically and that I was somehow addicted to what I thought was a safe activity ! I could not figure out what was wrong but tried looking at a resource for months that helped in a way I never dreamed possible : It is in some ways the opposite of Scientology.
I started studying a different subject and language really to see if I could learn any complex ideas or if my faculties somehow deteriorated below that point .
I started reading a site that freed up my ability to doubt terms and ideas and still hold them in my mind - not allowed in Scientology . I also found that joking around and not being beholden to sacred or authoritative ideas or sources while looking at ideas was wonderful for triggering critical examination as in " is this idea applicable to situation x or a little or the opposite or paradoxically or as a deconstruction " and other evaluations with complexity and depth and personal taste and opinions accepted as authentic . This site has lots of joking around and not needing references or academic or any support for ideas other than someone presenting them and having interest in them . Please do not dismiss the site as a tool for helping critical thinking in a safe slow gradual way that does not overtly attack cults or their values directly because it is on a light topic in name . It has teeth for biting into closed and imprisoned minds to bit by bit safely require independent thought .
The site is called TV Tropes . From the site itself I will take a quote :What is this about? This wiki is a catalog of the tricks of the trade for writing fiction. Tropes are devices and conventions that a writer can reasonably rely on as being present in the audience members' minds and expectations. On the whole, tropes are not clichés. The word clichéd means "stereotyped and trite." In other words, dull and uninteresting. We are not looking for dull and uninteresting entries. We are here to recognize tropes and play with them, not to make fun of them. The wiki is called "TV Tropes" because TV is where we started. Over the course of a few years, our scope has crept out to include other media. Tropes transcend television. They reflect life. Since a lot of art, especially the popular arts, do their best to reflect life, tropes are likely to show up everywhere. We are not a stuffy encyclopedic wiki. We're a buttload more informal. We encourage breezy language and original thought. There Is No Such Thing As Notability, and no citations are needed. If your entry cannot gather any evidence by the Wiki Magic, it will just wither and die. Until then, though, it will be available through the Main Tropes Index. End quote .
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And importantly the opposite of Scientology :
Administrivia: There Is No Such Thing as Notability
This is not Wikipedia. You will see these words written in many places on the website. One of the main ways we are different from them is our take on "notability."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX[h=All works are notable.]1[/h] Wikipedia tries in many regards to be the opposite of what we are. We want to be fun, interesting and a cool place to sink hours of time. Wikipedia wants to be a compilation of previously published facts from respected sources. Serious Business. Presented with a choice between serious and fun, we went with fun. Much of our wiki relies on the "Examples" section, where we pull our many articles together. Every now and then you might see a Wikipedia Updater who will delete your example with no reason. A small Edit War of delete/restore will start, before someone on the discussion page brings up "notability." This page is your response. If it fits the trope description, then it can be put in. All it requires is someone to put it in there. Simple as that. It could be a multi-million viewer ABC sitcom, or an all-but-forgotten Japanese videogame, or a Sprite Comic about EarthBound that died after seven strips. We have examples ranging from media as diverse as Film to Fan Fiction and everything in between. Removing tropes, examples... anything... because of "notability" stifles the wiki. It can intimidate new writers who wanted to put in an example they liked and had it shot down. This is a double-edged sword. Someone could add an example they made up and there is really nothing you could do to stop them. If the discussion finds an example to be purely fictional then it might get deleted, might. That's the way of things. But remember, we're here to have fun. Don't let this stuff burn you out. End quote .
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See the site has thousands of Tropes - ideas or themes that appear and repeat in works of fiction , nonfiction and media of all kinds and religions and real life . Very , very little is forbidden which encourages creativity and imagination be independently employed . It also has an attitude of one troper ( person who posts at the site ) sees that story or character as one way and another a different one ? They both have equal importance and can present their ideas fully and let people agree , disagree or not care . It makes you think and coordinate vast amounts of info to fully understand the site and you have freedom to come and go as you wish and read a little on your favorite TV show or novel or opera or rock song or artist or anime or whatever and can cross reference on character type or behavior or many , many other things so if you like movies with certain story elements or directing you can find more or similar songs or novels , comic books and it goes on and on .
YOU decide what is significant or not and can be really , really into obscure details and ideas or just look at broad themes or anything you choose . It helped free up some of my critical thinking as I unknowingly regained some ability to goof off without guilt and read something non-Hubbard without feeling like a traitor as how could knowing a small detail about a comic book or old foreign novel or play be wrong ? Surely my " certainty " could withstand this harmless trivial information .
I also over time realized I was learning an actual language from all the trope names and that some words contradict each other but that is acknowledged openly as a kind of " Hey , no one here has all the answers or is certain to be right about every situation or possibility " attitude seeped into me and it relaxed me to feel this way and made me get to a point of confidence in my ability to learn something without Hubbard's methods or blind obedience to an authority and that joking helped learning and reason . In Scientology he so severely condemns all other indoctrination and education that I was broken down and convinced I was an idiot virtually incapable of reading despite indications of the opposite from the " wog " educational system .
Not everyone will need or like TV tropes but for some it can be an educational and recreational anti - Scientology . No money asked , no commitment required , no authority sited , your input allowed and encouraged , open discussion encouraged and disagreement accepted , joking around about anything encouraged and you choose what and how to look at and contribute to or not .
If you got similar experiences please let me know and if this sounds good feel free to try It !
I think there are many , many ways to free a mind and use imagination and creativity that are far , far better than Scientology .
Last edited by mockingbird; 31st December 2014 at 07:28 PM.
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