Wednesday, April 24, 2024

Scientology Reflections (7) 10 Years After Leaving-A Delicate Problem

 Scientology Reflections (7) 10 Years After Leaving-A Delicate Problem


This is the seventh post in a series that I am publishing in 2024. The series is on the journey I have been on AFTER leaving Scientology and Dianetics and what my experiences were, and mistakes I made, and things that I learned, some shortly after leaving Scientology and others further along the way, even up to the present day. Some of this involves Scientology and Dianetics. Some involves the process of leaving a cult. Some is just knowledge that I could have benefited from knowing sooner, that may even be unrelated to the cultic topic entirely. 

For anyone who is unaware, I was in Scientology for twenty five years, between 1989 and 2014. I left in 2014 and discovered that Scientology is a harmful fraud and jam packed with lies and further it is composed of techniques plagiarized from other practices and sources. Ronald Hubbard had the ability to take a practice, file off the serial numbers and repackage it as his own in first Dianetics and later Scientology. 


L. Ron Hubbard. “Ron looks to the future with the sea org, ”

 Ronald Hubbard. 

I upon leaving Scientology decided that a democratic system of some kind is better than the fascist dictatorship that exists in Scientology. And make no mistake, Scientology's not remotely democratic. 

So, I fully intend to support some kind of democracy and oppose authoritarian, fascist, totalitarian and other similar systems.  So, I ended up opposing a lot of the systems in the world today, a lot of the policies in the world today and so on. 


Over time I have found numerous obstacles to a democracy being able to function. I could go on for some time regarding many of them. 

But one thing that I have had to come to terms with is that if we are to have a democracy and have it work, we are going to need a population that is educated enough to participate and not be completely unaware or incapable of even understanding what is going on.

The sad reality is we will need a population that is literate enough to make decisions for themselves and they are going to have to read things for themselves or they will be extremely vulnerable to propaganda and incapable of even examining the arguments for and against ideas. 

And the sad truth is, if the research data is accurate, they are not ready, not even close.


"Nationwide, on average, 79% of U.S. adults are literate in 2022. 21% of adults in the US are illiterate in 2022. 54% of adults have a literacy below sixth-grade level. 21% of Americans 18 and older are illiterate in 2022."

 source 55 US Literacy Statistics: Literacy Rate, Average Reading Level by Steven Zauderer

So, the grim reality is over half the adults, 130 million people, are not literate enough to do their own fact checking. They are not capable of applying the most basic ideas in critical thinking.

I have written about this at length in Mockingbird's Nest blog on Scientology, so I won't go over the whole encyclopedia of information that I have published but I will point out one of the simplest ideas that is essential for a person to be able to even form an educated opinion about a topic. 

Briefly, I want to go over a few ideas from the fourth post in this series (just to refresh your memory)

“There must be discussion to show how experience is to be interpreted. Wrong opinions and practices gradually yield to fact and argument; but facts and arguments, to produce any effect on the mind, must be brought before it.

 Very few facts are able to tell their own story, without comments to bring out their meaning. The whole strength and value, then, of human judgment depending on the one property, that it can be set right when it is wrong, reliance can be placed on it only when the means of setting it right are kept constantly at hand. 

In the case of any person whose judgement is really deserving of confidence, how has it become so? Because he has kept his mind open to criticism of his opinions and conduct.”

John Stuart Mill, On Liberty, published in 1859


“the only way in which a human being can make some approach to knowing the whole of a subject, is by hearing what can be said about it by persons of every variety of opinion, and studying all modes in which it can be looked at by every character of mind. No wise man ever acquired his wisdom in any mode but this; nor is it in the nature of human intellect to become wise in any other manner.”

― John Stuart Mill, On Liberty


“He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them. But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side, if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion... Nor is it enough that he should hear the opinions of adversaries from his own teachers, presented as they state them, and accompanied by what they offer as refutations. He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them...he must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form.”

― John Stuart Mill, On Liberty


John Stuart Mill makes a persuasive case for hearing the best arguments for and against ideas before being able to properly form an opinion.

He also makes it clear that we need to hear about a subject from people of all types of opinions and backgrounds and from all different kinds of approaches to the subject. 

I have heard of a professor who has classes on certain texts and he brings in people from different backgrounds to examine the topic from a historical perspective or a political perspective or another perspective in a different semester. Each year he tries to get one of several experts on different subjects to give their perspective. 

People who have different philosophies and education on different topics give their own perspective on the subject to add more to the understanding of the professor and the class. 


It's somewhat against human nature to look for the evidence against what we believe or the best evidence for arguments against our beliefs. But it's a foundation of good critical thinking.

I have seen efforts to explain phenomena in human behavior and sometimes information from a different subject is essential to finding a highly plausible explanation.

In psychology we have the difference between the Northern states and Southern states in the US in aggression and the hypothesis that the culture of the people who settled these areas and the honor culture of the people who settled the South is a highly plausible explanation and supported by empirical evidence from psychology research.

We also have the fact that since a peak in crime in America in the early nineties we had a huge decrease (by about half by some estimates). Research involving the harm leaded gas caused and the removal of lead from gas is recognized by many researchers and experts as extremely likely to be a major factor, if not the biggest factor, in causing the huge decrease in crime we have seen since the early nineties.

Without that information from another field we might never understand the huge reduction in American crime. 

There are many other examples of information from a different perspective or subject being essential for understanding something important in a subject. 

Without that you might have an incorrect conclusion. Now an important point to me is that you need a good basic grounding in a subject itself to form an educated opinion on the subject in general and specific ideas in particular. 

I am not at all a fan of the "All you need to know is..." style of claims, regardless of the topic. That is anti critical thinking and anti looking at all the relevant information regarding a claim. 

The opposite of this in some ways is something I have written about in the past that is worth mentioning to me.

I call it The Sixty Minutes approach. I saw an episode of the American news television show years ago and it introduced a way to evaluate something that's worth using.

A woman was an assistant coach at a college basketball team and the head coach retired. She was not offered the head coaching position. A man who was far less qualified got the job.

The attorney for the woman coach put up a big piece of paper and put the names of her client on one side and the name of the man who got the job on the other side and below each person she listed all the major qualifications they had. The man had two years experience as an assistant coach.

The woman had decades of experience and winning numerous awards and the team she coached winning a tremendous number of games and the players she coached winning various awards and on and on and on. 

At the end the male coach had his two years as an assistant and the woman coach had the entire side filled with both individual and team accomplishments that she could be given the credit for.

The jury found that the team did discriminate against her, because no other explanation was offered and no one believed that the woman was less qualified than the man.

I realized that this is useful for weighing the evidence for and against claims. 

There are many situations in which you can use this.

I would have done far better in my life regarding Scientology and a million other things if I had adopted this mindset and applied these principles with personal discipline religiously to my life. 

I frankly have found it's especially useful for beliefs or an outlook that is strongly or deeply held. For most people this automatically includes religion, politics and similarly passionate or traditionally close minded beliefs. 

Lots of incidents of hearing one thing from just one side and having beliefs that are not accurate can occur but if you look at the information from different sides in their best form you can often see that there is strong evidence that is credible for a different perspective or you might have an opinion that's not what Democrats or Republicans or most media say on a political issue, for example, if you have looked at information from a variety of sources. End quote

So, in light of the literacy rate in America we have a huge problem. I personally think that people need to be able to understand and apply both the ideas that John Stuart Mill in my opinion made compelling arguments for and also the idea of weighing ALL the evidence for and against an idea in a balanced way, that's not rushed or overly biased.

With over half the adults in the country in my opinion likely incapable of reading the ideas here and about a fifth incapable of reading at all, we have a huge obstacle to a functional population for democracy or any other task that requires even a tiny ability to apply critical thinking for oneself. These people can't read the evidence for and against claims and understand or evaluate it. 

They in my opinion can't read about history. Or at least they can't read as well as I would hope for at a minimum level to fully get what they read. So, this presents a huge problem, not just for these individuals, but for a democratic society.


“History is important. If you don't know history it is as if you were born yesterday. And if you were born yesterday, anybody up there in a position of power can tell you anything, and you have no way of checking up on it.”

― Howard Zinn

I have many times since leaving Scientology heard claims that I was able to challenge because they involved historical information and they either contradicted information that I already had or they involved something empirical (measurable or observable with human senses or equipment) that I could check on. 

Sometimes I found that a claim is not supported by the scientific and historical evidence, not even slightly. Sometimes I found that there was some event that I didn't know about. 

But I had a basis and a method to start looking and often could say, "Here's a lot of evidence that contradicts that idea, I can provide links to citations from sources going back decades and they are consistent. Your information is not supported by any evidence I have found and is part of a modern conspiracy theory. Why would people over the last fifty years manufacture fake evidence to support a conspiracy in 2023?"

Sometimes it's quite clear. Sometimes it's not. A lot of the time it relates to how well I know the history of the topic at hand, or a particular part that is challenged by a particular claim. 

And I have had to be willing to look at the claims and evidence for multiple sides of the issue. 

Now, I know that from the ancient past we had philosophers who proposed the solution to this problem was to simply let the educated class, the philosophers themselves of course, either rule directly or be the advisers to whoever rules, and thereby one step from power and living the lives of honored intellectual aristocracy and the problems with this should be obvious. The philosophers would look out for themselves and even if an odd one here or there was a bit more decent and fair, the system itself couldn't be. 

I am afraid that the only system that I can see as fair is a democracy and like it or not all adult citizens should be able to participate and have the power be as fairly distributed as possible. And the only thing that makes sense to me is that you let qualified adults vote. Who is not qualified? Perhaps the severely mentally handicapped or insane. I have been on both sides of the idea of allowing and disqualifying felons and don't know the right answer, honestly. 

But for everyone else, I hope they can vote and instead of making a test for them to be allowed, I would rather we improve the education system to prepare them, personally. Otherwise we can see that politicians could have minorities fail any test and they could have their supporters pass or be grandfathered in, as was done in the past to ensure that whites could vote and black people couldn't, for example, in the US.

So, I do not want any repeating of that awful policy. 

Or any scheming to create what amounts to the same thing but by another name or list of criteria.

Often people will say that ideas need to be taken on in some kind of marketplace of ideas and defeated if they are bad or championed to victory if they are good, but this is an idea that requires a tremendous number of things to work. 

I have long been against burning books and that sort of thing, personally.


I am not going to pretend that I have a one size fits all solution to this issue or that I know all the factors that have resulted in this outcome. 

I can say that lots of experts say that other countries have better outcomes at education, particularly Finland as one example. If this is true then possibly trying the methods they use may be useful in the US. One thing that the US is an outlier on is that most public education is financed by local property taxes, so you have far better schools in wealthy communities and mediocre schools in middle class communities and terrible schools in poor communities in general. 


I am going to include links to a number of my posts related to this topic.

Here's a link to the blog archive by topic



Cornerstones of Critical Thinking


Several more posts on critical thinking


Critical Thinking









I am going to close this with a lengthy quote from George Carlin for your consideration:

“But there’s a reason. There’s a reason. There’s a reason for this, there’s a reason education sucks, and it’s the same reason that it will never, ever, ever be fixed. It’s never gonna get any better. 

Don’t look for it. 

Be happy with what you got. Because the owners of this country don't want that.

 I'm talking about the real owners now, the real owners, the big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. 

Forget the politicians. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. You don't. You have no choice. You have owners. They own you. They own everything. 


They own all the important land. They own and control the corporations. They’ve long since bought and paid for the senate, the congress, the state houses, the city halls, they got the judges in their back pockets and they own all the big media companies so they control just about all of the news and information you get to hear.

 They got you by the balls. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying, lobbying, to get what they want. Well, we know what they want. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but I'll tell you what they don’t want: They don’t want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking.

 They don’t want well informed, well educated people capable of critical thinking. They’re not interested in that. That doesn’t help them. Thats against their interests. Thats right. They don’t want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table to figure out how badly they’re getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago.

 They don’t want that. You know what they want? They want obedient workers. Obedient workers. People who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork, and just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shittier jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and the vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now they’re coming for your Social Security money.

 They want your retirement money. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? They’ll get it. They’ll get it all from you, sooner or later, 'cause they own this fucking place.

 It's a big club, and you ain’t in it. You and I are not in the big club. And by the way, it's the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. All day long beating you over the head in their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. The table is tilted folks. 

The game is rigged, and nobody seems to notice, nobody seems to care. Good honest hard-working people -- white collar, blue collar, it doesn’t matter what color shirt you have on -- good honest hard-working people continue -- these are people of modest means -- continue to elect these rich cocksuckers who don’t give a fuck about them. They don’t give a fuck about you. They don’t give a fuck about you. They don't care about you at all -- at all -- at all. And nobody seems to notice, nobody seems to care. 

That's what the owners count on; the fact that Americans will probably remain willfully ignorant of the big red, white and blue dick that's being jammed up their assholes everyday. Because the owners of this country know the truth: it's called the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.”

― George Carlin





Scientology Reflections (7) 10 Years After Leaving-A Delicate Problem

Thursday, April 18, 2024

Scientology Reflections (6) 10 Years After Leaving-A Darker Reality

 Scientology Reflections (6) 10 Years After Leaving-A Darker Reality

This is the sixth post in a series that I am publishing in 2024. The series is on the journey I have been on AFTER leaving Scientology and Dianetics and what my experiences were, and mistakes I made, and things that I learned, some shortly after leaving Scientology and others further along the way, even up to the present day. Some of this involves Scientology and Dianetics. Some involves the process of leaving a cult. Some is just knowledge that I could have benefited from knowing sooner, that may even be unrelated to the cultic topic entirely. 

For anyone who is unaware, I was in Scientology for twenty five years, between 1989 and 2014. I left in 2014 and discovered that Scientology is a harmful fraud and jam packed with lies and further it is composed of techniques plagiarized from other practices and sources. Ronald Hubbard had the ability to take a practice, file off the serial numbers and repackage it as his own in first Dianetics and later Scientology. 


L. Ron Hubbard. “Ron looks to the future with the sea org, ”

 Ronald Hubbard. 


Something worth mentioning that is a huge part of the world of cult recovery and the process of leaving a cult is the phenomenon of people that are affected by the leaving of a cult and their experiences in the cult. 

It is a topic that is not generally addressed in society as it should be in my experience and opinion.

The book Shattered Assumptions by Ronnie Janoff-Bulman deals with the issue of people having experiences that break their assumptions about themselves and the world.

In my opinion the theory recognizes a very real phenomena. I am not saying it is a perfect model or absolutely certain it is correct regarding every detail of the theory and I definitely do not know if the therapeutic method recommended is effective. 

But beginning to recognize and describe a problem or issue is a vital step to addressing the problem or issue. So, in my opinion the model is worth examining and for many people the book is worth reading.

I am going to very briefly quote a few excerpts from the Wikipedia entry on shattered assumptions to give a concise description of the idea:


Shattered Assumptions Theory



In social psychology, shattered assumptions theory proposes that experiencing traumatic events can change how victims and survivors view themselves and the world. Specifically, the theory – published by Ronnie Janoff-Bulman in 1992 – concerns the effect that negative events have on three inherent assumptions: overall benevolence of the world, meaningfulness of the world, and self worth. These fundamental beliefs are the bedrock of our conceptual system and are the assumptions we are least aware of and least likely to challenge. They constitute our "assumptive world," defined as "a strongly held set of assumptions about the world and the self which is confidently maintained and used as a means of recognizing, planning, and acting" by C. M. Parkes. According to Janoff-Bulman, traumatic life events shatter these core assumptions, and coping involves rebuilding a viable assumptive world.



Basic Assumptions


According to Janoff-Bulman, people generally hold three fundamental assumptions about the world that are built and confirmed over years of experience: the world is benevolent, the world is meaningful, and I am worthy.


 These are tacit assumptions that serve as a basis of our well-being and our guides in navigating daily life. Together these assumptions provide us with a sense of relative invulnerability that enables us to awake each morning and face the day. Thus in her book Janoff-Bulman notes that the most common response she heard when doing research with very different victim populations was, "I never thought it could happen to me." Brewin & Holmes expand this list to five main assumptions, adding the world is predictable, and the assumption of invulnerability. The belief in predictability is represented in Janoff-Bulman's meaningfulness assumption, and invulnerability is afforded by the three fundamental assumptions she posits. There is therefore consistency across the two views.


The world is benevolent


This assumption concerns one's overall impression of the goodness or virtue of the world. This constitutes two sub-assumptions: the benevolence of the world as an entity, and the benevolence of the people in that world. The benevolence of the world and people refer to the world and people close to us rather than the larger, distant impersonal world. These core beliefs begin to develop through early interactions with caregivers. These two ideas can develop independently through selecting experiences, but aren't exempt from influencing one another. Measuring this type of assumption has been done using the Negative Cognitions about the World subscale of the Posttraumatic Cognitions Inventory.


The world is meaningful


The second fundamental assumption addresses not only why events happen in our world, but why they happen to specific people. A meaningful world is one that makes sense--it is one in which we can see the contingency between a person and his or her outcomes. In other words, an outcome, positive or negative, makes sense when it corresponds to the person's behavior or character; such a world is predictable and what happens to us is not random. When an unjust event happens to an 'undeserving' person it is viewed as unfair or wrong. On the flipside, it is assumed that a good person encounters positive events, and that careful people who engage in the right behaviors can avoid negative outcome such as serious illness or debilitating accidents. Bad, careless people are expected to experience negative events. When a person who is good in the eyes of their loved ones dies young of an illness, it seems unfair, particularly to the loved ones of the deceased. Thus, the early death of someone who is "deserving of good things" can shatter the assumption that the world is meaningful or logical.


The self is worthy


The final fundamental assumption evaluates one's self as a positive, moral, and decent--and thus deserving of good outcomes in life. Individuals' assessment of their self-worth contributes to their success in life. A person's positive self-worth encourages them to be effective in their tasks at hand. Generally, this assumption enables an individual to maintain a belief that s/he has the ability to control positive or negative outcomes.


Shattered Assumptions


According to the theory, there are some extreme events that shatter these worldviews. They severely challenge and break assumptions about the world and oneself. Examples of such events might be the unwarranted murder of a loved one, being critically injured, being physically or emotionally abused by others, losing a job and not having an income, or living through a pandemic. Such events are particularly traumatic for people who have had a generally positive life. Because these people have such strong, optimistic assumptions, the disintegration of these views can be more traumatic. End quote from Wikipedia

 

I have witnessed a number of things that are related to this. In many social media groups that are related to escaping abusive relationships and relationships with people labeled narcissists, sociopaths, psychopaths and various other types of human predators I saw that a large number of people go through certain things, many are similar to cult survivors who leave or are cast out of cults. 

One thing that is prevalent is that many of these people have a dark view of the world. Their past assumptions that the world is just are shattered. They don't believe that good things happen to good people. They know that bad things, horrible things, truly evil things can happen to anyone. 

They often discovered that abusers can manipulate and con the systems in society such as family court, divorce court, the police, and other institutions to get what they want. 

They discovered that the human predators in this world can fool people including family and friends as well. 


The author Bill Eddy has been dealing with this issue in court as an attorney and specialized in conflict resolution and dealing with difficult to deal with personalities for years. 

He has over twenty books on many aspects of the issue including political leaders, divorce and custody issues, workplace bullies and on and on. 


I highly recommend his work. He has tremendous experience with both dealing with such people and the problems they present as well as the fact that society is often ill equipped to deal with such people and this makes the situation worse as judges, cops, social workers, employers, HR representatives and many others don't believe that they are dealing with such people or that they are as bad and sometimes ornery or malicious as they actually can be. 

There's a tremendous overlap in my opinion for many ex cult members in seeing that courts and police can be unwilling or ineffective regarding dealing with abusive or unfair or downright criminal conduct by a cult. 

This definitely shatters assumptions about the world. Many people who are never in cults, aka "normal" people, do not believe the claims of ex cult members and say, "If a fraction of that was true, the police WOULD HAVE STOPPED IT YEARS AGO!" as if real life fits the plot of a police procedural show like Law and Order. 

In real life many crimes are never solved. 

And many criminal organizations such as Scientology are allowed to operate in many countries for decades after crimes are revealed.

And the fact that the survivors of cults and their traumatized family members are often not believed makes their situation worse, by a lot in many cases. 

This is obviously in addition to the many incorrect assumptions many people have about cults and cult members. They see the world as just and themselves as above cultic influence and they justify this by assuming that cult members are vulnerable to recruitment by being especially gullible, stupid, crazy, and on and on.

Cult Expert Margaret Singer interviewed over four thousand ex cult members over decades. She was one of the top cult experts in the world in my opinion.

She remarked that as a college professor she every semester got new students who would discuss the various personality disorders they assumed that the cult members must have BEFORE being recruited into a cult to make them potential cult members and how shocked they were as she explained to them that anyone could be recruited by a cult. The requirement to be vulnerable to a cult is to be a person who could be lied to. That's it.

And any of us can be lied to. 


"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself — and you are the easiest person to fool.” Richard Feynman



A lot of cult experts have observed that the belief by an individual that they personally aren't someone who could be fooled or manipulated or hypnotized or brainwashed by whatever terms they describe the act of undue influence and whatever model they are aware of is essential to a person being manipulated in exactly this way. You let your guard down and relax when you are certain you have nothing to worry about.

So, to me the lesson is WE ARE ALL ALWAYS VULNERABLE!!!

You may be aware that this person or that person is lying or running a fraud or using harmful methods or you may be aware that this group or that group is harmful, exploitative, unethical, or a cult. But this is no assurance that a different person or group is not able to manipulate you or me. 

We should have the humility to see that we are always human, vulnerable, and fallible. We may have inaccurate beliefs that make us especially vulnerable to one person or group or another at various times and we certainly have subjects we are ignorant about that contribute to our vulnerability. No one knows everything about everything. 


A related aspect of the cultic experience and leaving or being cast out of a cult is not one that precult life prepares most of us for. 

Many ex cult members see the world quite differently after the cult. The fact is a tremendous amount, but certainly not all, see themselves and the rest of the world as far more capable of evil and vulnerable to evil. 

Usually a cult breaks a person down and has the person engage in excessive confession in some form. This was noted by Robert Jay Lifton in his eight criteria for thought reform. In Scientology this is routine via the auditing in Scientology and the ethics conditions and overts and witholds (OWs) write ups.

It is not an exaggeration to say that Scientology requires many people to confess to thousands and thousands of hidden evil acts and hidden secrets. 

The Truth Rundown on the RPF in the Sea Org may be the most extreme version of this. 

A key reason for this is to make a person lose ALL pride they had as they are overwhelmed with shame. Deep profound shame and self hatred is often the result of the abuse, trauma, and excessive confession that occurs in Scientology and many other cults. 

You are primed to be changed by the cult when you have lost your confidence in yourself, your judgement, your character and the choices that you made over your entire life before the cult. The cult can then indoctrinate a recruit and reshape them into a pawn to be manipulated. And the process includes steps to make the transformation permanent and have self protection (for the indoctrination) via beliefs, practices and feelings that are reinforcing the indoctrination via the behavior, words, and even feelings and thoughts of the cult member.


So, as a consequence when a person leaves a cult, if they manage to reject the doctrine and behavior (and to a great degree the beliefs and emotions) the cult sought to create and preserve they often still have the guilt, self hate, and shame they had and additionally feel they were an evil person while in the cult, because they realize the harm the group did, they realize that they helped the cult to do this and many of their own actions were harmful. While in the cult lots of actions are justified by the goals of the group and some are justified because opposition to the cult is itself seen as evil while in the cult.

Additionally, many ex cult members are reluctant to trust people, to love people and to make themselves vulnerable to abuse and betrayal. 

There is a specific type of a feeling of betrayal of self that was noted to occur in both ex cult members and victims of childhood sexual abuse by Daniel Shaw in his work on Traumatic Narcissism. He found that both types of survivors were abused or mistreated and may or may not have been able to escape or physically fight back, to varying degrees depending on their age and a variety of circumstances but they often feel they were wrong to trust or even love someone or a group or guru (cult leader) that was willing to harm or abuse.

Plainly, they hate themselves and feel profound shame that they were fooled in these circumstances. 

For some ex members and survivors of childhood abuse of this type deep shame can be a major part of their life going forward. It can be the defining emotion for them and persist for decades in some cases.

It gives a very different perspective. Some of these people have literally hundreds of negative thoughts about themselves on a daily basis and never escape this.

It is hard to convey to someone that the normal daily routine experienced by a person is to wake up, hating themselves, thinking dozens of negative thoughts and feeling things like worthlessness, uselessness, not being good enough for anything or anyone, feeling like the worst person in the world and either wanting to die or thinking that the only thing that they can do to improve the world is to leave it and feeling like life can't improve for them and that they are in a no win situation. They may feel that being alone is unbearable and simultaneously feel that making themselves emotionally vulnerable is an act of self betrayal they don't dare repeat. 

It can be described as riding a merry go round and wanting to reach for a metaphorical brass ring (being relationships in this comparison) and knowing that one will never reach the ring and fall off the merry go round into more unbearable pain and betrayal if they try but knowing that one is going to be miserable and unfulfilled to the point of desperation and crushing loneliness if they don't get that ring.

The feeling that many ex cult members experience when they leave or are cast out is rightly described by Daniel Shaw as "worse than death." The deep shame is often mortifying humiliation and feels like a death by shame. It is being forced to bear the unbearable and live on through something that you don't see how you can live through.

I have seen numerous ex members of Scientology and other cults express suicidal ideation. They may or may not attempt suicide. Many people who were in Scientology have committed or attempted suicide. The children raised in The Sea Org are a particularly egregious example as many of these children were taken from their parents and alternately neglected and abused with little or no love in their lives. Often their parents rejected them if they didn't succeed in The Sea Org, especially if they rejected Scientology, and they ended up often homeless and some became prostitutes and/or drug addicts and then committed suicide.

The Scientology organization and Sea Org work quite hard at hiding the numerous failures they have had at creating the strong families that Scientology promotes when in fact Scientology destroys families and individuals routinely. 

Other cults unfortunately often have similar results.

The education we usually get in society doesn't include letting us know that if we are abused or neglected and survive that we may be suicidal and feel profound shame that persists.

It is not something most parents teach children and religious and secular education is usually lacking in this as well. 

I am aware that various therapies and techniques are promoted by several people for this and not certain of the effectiveness of these. I have not seen them fail personally nor have I seen them succeed, so I can neither support or condemn them. 

A reality that is unpleasant is that many ex cult members are not going to get therapy after leaving a cult. With some people it is because of economic reasons, with others it involves trust and the abuse they experienced in the cult. Many cults described their harmful techniques as therapeutic and because of this ex members are unwilling to be vulnerable to therapy and therapists again.

It is a simple fact that we have to deal with. 

I know that some ex members have claimed some recovery or relief from education and communication about their experiences but certainly don't claim this is a perfect or complete solution. It certainly is not desired by everyone in this situation and many ex members reach a certain degree of progress and get no further via education alone. 

The results seem to vary greatly. I have seen the whole spectrum from little or no improvement to vast improvement and everything in between from education.

I think that sometimes the statement that the first step in handling a problem is describing it accurately. I hope that I have at least done this here.

There's definitely a stigma associated with being an ex cult member and further stigma associated with being suicidal or depressed or ashamed. So, you can have family members and friends who leave a cult and are reluctant to admit or discuss these issues. 

Sometimes they never tell anyone and never recover and tragically some ex cult members suffer for the rest of their lives and obviously this in my opinion contributes to some of the suicides by ex cult members.

If you want to understand ex cult members it is almost mandatory to understand the mindset of a person taught to be ashamed of themselves and extremely negative in their thoughts about themselves and often downright suicidal mindset as a result of this, even if they dare not act on these thoughts or reveal them to anyone. The cult indoctrination has a self protecting mechanism of deep self hatred and shame that is protected by feeling weak and worthless and unworthy of compassion from oneself or anyone else that makes asking for help a trigger to be closed off and self destructive, not open and vulnerable. 

Much of cult indoctrination has been designed with self protecting mechanics like this. When the ex member wants to change or reveal abuse or neglect by the cult often the doctrine interprets this as something to trigger a different behavior and make seeking outside help or revealing the secrets and crimes of the cult unthinkable. Deeply held strong emotions and unexamined assumptions and attitudes are often essential to this process, this trap that is meant to never be escaped, the prison of the mind. Robert Jay Lifton described this as thought stopping cliches in his work. He also described it quite well in his eight criteria for thought reform. 


Here's a link to The Eight Criteria For Thought Reform by Robert Jay Lifton:



Dr. Robert J. Lifton's Criteria For Thought Reform...


Here's a link to my blog archive by topic:


Here are several more blog posts related to the issues described in this post.


The Poisoned Heart




The Good, The Bad and The Ugly


The Good, The Bad and The Ugly


Seeing Life Through Blood Stained Glasses


Seeing Life Through Blood Stained Glasses


Scientology Reflections (6) 10 Years After Leaving-A Darker Reality

Tuesday, April 9, 2024

Scientology Reflections (5) 10 Years After Leaving-More Types of People

 Scientology Reflections (5) 10 Years After Leaving-More Types of People


This is the fifth post in a series that I am publishing in 2024. The series is on the journey I have been on AFTER leaving Scientology and Dianetics and what my experiences were, and mistakes I made, and things that I learned, some shortly after leaving Scientology and others further along the way, even up to the present day. Some of this involves Scientology and Dianetics. Some involves the process of leaving a cult. Some is just knowledge that I could have benefited from knowing sooner, that may even be unrelated to the cultic topic entirely. 

For anyone who is unaware, I was in Scientology for twenty five years, between 1989 and 2014. I left in 2014 and discovered that Scientology is a harmful fraud and jam packed with lies and further it is composed of techniques plagiarized from other practices and sources. Ronald Hubbard had the ability to take a practice, file off the serial numbers and repackage it as his own in first Dianetics and later Scientology. 


L. Ron Hubbard. “Ron looks to the future with the sea org, ”

 Ronald Hubbard. 

Something that is worth giving more attention after leaving Scientology is the realization that there are more types of people than Scientology described, by a lot. Not only are there highly empathic people, extremely low empathy people, we might call human predators, and quite likely the majority of us who are in the middle and sometimes good and sometimes bad and overall, well frankly ugly, meaning a difficult to understand at times combination of good and bad traits and good and bad behavior, (which I explored at length in the blog post The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly at Mockingbird's Nest blog on Scientology) but there are other dimensions to human beings and greater variety across those dimensions, which Scientology and some simple minded approaches don't recognize or even consider. 


Here's a link to The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.



“Some never participate. Life happens to them. They get by on little more than dumb persistence and resist with anger or violence all things that might lift them out of resentment-filled illusions of security.

-Alma Mavis Taraza”

― Frank Herbert, Chapterhouse: Dune

I have found that we have different motives and ways of approaching life. It might be quite obvious to some people, but it took me a lot of experience to see that a significant number of people are going to just go through life and persist.

They are not trying to figure out anything in particular or verify anything. They are perhaps content or perhaps happy generally or unhappy, but in any case they just go along. They may or may not have a religion or philosophy they have been taught but they ain't testing anything like that or seeking greater wisdom. 


Sometimes they make it quite clear by telling you they have no interest in reflection on anything. They often never read a book about anything deep or serious after high school or college. 

This is not a condemnation and it's not about character or intelligence. They can be bright or dull. 

They can have little education or a lot. I have seen this with high school drop outs, graduates and even college graduates. Some people get a college degree and promise themselves they are never gonna open another book after they graduate. 

It is not a situation that requires cult indoctrination. Some people are not pursuing any more knowledge after some point in their lives.

They simply are not seeking wisdom or knowledge or big answers. Not even a little bit once in a while.

Some of them vote, lots of them don't. Lots of them either avoid politics or get information exclusively from the blue feed or red feed and never question the information or work to verify it or see if the other side has a good rebuttal. They may have no interest in politics and either always vote the same way or simply do not vote. 

A small percentage are the elusive "independent" voters who are extremely fickle and just vote by their gut instinct and often vote against whichever party is in power or not, as one example.

The overall point is that a lot of people, maybe most, really value having many things stay the same, like their opinions and values and don't want them to change.

They may want a better job or occasionally a different or better partner but they are not looking to fundamentally change themselves or more exactly not looking to change or develop their minds. 



“It is so shocking to find out how many people do not believe that they can learn, and how many more believe learning to be difficult.”

― Frank Herbert, Dune


"54% of adults have a literacy below sixth-grade level. 21% of Americans 18 and older are illiterate in 2022."

 From 55 US Literacy Statistics: Literacy Rate, Average Reading Level by Steven Zauderer June 30, 2023


I think it's fundamentally unfair to think that is is what must be, specifically regarding the state of education and American education as one example. This is not going to be an extensive or authoritative examination or criticism of the US education system or education in general. 

I am just going to say that outcomes regarding education vary tremendously and the result under one system doesn't in my opinion reflect the best possible outcome for the students necessarily. They might do far better under a better system which may already be used in other countries for example. Finland reportedly has far better outcomes on average than most other countries, as one example. 

And I certainly am not an expert on education or IQ but I think that the research of James R. Flynn on The Flynn Effect supports the idea that race has no proven bearing on intelligence in general. 

He found that exposure to education and math and complex subjects resulted in extremely rapid rises in IQ scores via conventional testing, which suggests that opportunity and practice of aptitude help to develop them in members of all groups, regardless of racial background.

I think unfortunately, lots of students get poor resources for education and discouraged rather than encouraged. Research on both The Pygmalion Effect and Golem Effect in psychology supports this idea in my opinion.

So, the overall point is, a lot of people are under the mistaken impression they personally can't learn or that learning in general is difficult, so they at some point stop trying.

You in my opinion run into lots of men and women and children and people of all types and backgrounds who could learn far more than they do, but due to circumstances beyond their control, are prohibited or discouraged.

So, that adds another element to the situation.

“Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken.”

― Frank Herbert, Dune

It is worth noting not just regarding knowledge and wisdom, that in other ways, some people never seek to change. It can be a big surprise to some, especially those who seek improvement or new experiences as a matter of course.

In Scientology one is indoctrinated with the idea that they should constantly be seeking to improve and overcome their flaws. And all through Scientology indoctrination one is told over and over and over that they and everyone else (besides Scientology founder Ronald Hubbard) has more and more flaws to work endlessly to overcome. 

So, the fact is that in real life all kinds of people exist and they don't have to fit the categories Hubbard described regarding seeking improvement. You are not a bad or evil person for just not seeking the improvement that a particular person thinks you need to get. You are not unaware or anything negative for not looking for the goals someone else imposes on you. 

That's a very different way to think of people than what is presented in Scientology.



“When a wise man does not understand, he says: "I do not understand." The fool and the uncultured are ashamed of their ignorance. They remain silent when a question could bring them wisdom.”

― Frank Herbert, The Godmakers


I was shocked by the fact that so many people are unwilling to admit ignorance. I have had several jobs outside of Scientology in which certain events occurred. As one example I was at Pepsi for four years and I discovered a disturbing trend. 

A bunch of guys got hired one summer and I would be in a meeting with a dozen or so guys and a boss would ask if there were people here ready to do certain things. The boss used terms I had never heard before, which I assumed are either terms that are used at Pepsi or at various businesses and they are terms one might learn in college.


We always had a bunch of guys who would say they could do whatever the boss asked for. I would note who said that and listen. 


At some point the bosses would leave the meeting and I would ask the guys who enthusiastically said yes what the terms meant. Every single time the guys would man for man say, I don't know what that means. I would ask how can you agree to do something without even knowing what you are agreeing to?  I would get told that you have to say you can do anything to get a job, then learn how to do it after. 

An interesting thing I observed was that the guys who have said that they could do any and everything they were asked for was that those guys got a promotion to sales very quickly and then they either sank or swam. Some did what management wanted and stayed, but some didn't succeed and were rapidly fired. 

But the point remains, lots of people don't ask questions when they don't understand. I run into new terms that are introduced in society and most people don't bother to learn what the terms mean and then the terms get over used.

Right now terms such as "narrative", "gaslighting", "impostor syndrome" and several others just seem to pop up in the society and people use these terms without finding out what they mean. An interesting thing that I run into is the phenomenon of a person using a new term, then explaining to them that just because an idea is in the definition of a term that alone doesn't make the idea true or true in a particular situation. 

An especially egregious example is the term "virtue signalling", lots of people accuse others of virtue signalling and the term is problematic. You can't prove that virtue signalling is occurring since you can't read minds and anyone accused can't prove they are not virtue signalling. It is not remotely scientific. You are just taking attention from the claims by a person and saying they are a bad person, with no evidence. 

Anyone can have a valid claim. Even if virtue signalling is a real thing (which you can't show empirically) the fact is the person who is doing it may have a valid claim anyway. 

So, my point in bringing up all of these examples is to show that the simple models of people in Scientology, and any other system that sums up all people as either just good or bad or a few categories of any type is that it is going to be incomplete and almost certainly incorrect. I am a believer that some people are thoroughly devoted to doing evil or willing to do it far more than most people and some people who are naturally trying to be helpful and kind to others in a majority of their actions and that most of us are somewhere in between and sometimes do bad and sometimes do good, but often have limits on how far we are willing to go, but extraordinary circumstances like what occurs during war for example, can have us go past what we thought were our limits. This can occur in prison too, or a cult. 

But even beyond those three rough and tentative categories people have so many variables in behavior that it's best to say there are more than we are likely to ever fit into any categories and any categories may be inaccurate or certainly incomplete. 

There are all sorts of things in nature that people thought could not exist, until they discovered them. I have heard of numerous animals and forms of life that were doubted until proof emerged. Scientists reportedly didn't believe a huge ape could exist until they were introduced to gorilla tribes. 

Many of the animals from Australia and the surrounding region weren't believed even possible until specimens were delivered. 

My point is that we can have a simple explanation for who and what a person is and be wrong. 

If I understood when I initially was recruited into Scientology that Hubbard could have been lying and had motivation beyond money that would have been helpful.

If I had understood that Scientology and Dianetics could have used techniques to induce euphoric trances and labeled them therapy and study technology and ethics conditions and persuaded people that these methods are in fact transcendent spiritual experiences I would have had an entirely different perspective. If I understood these techniques were used for decades or centuries and described and understood by others than I could have seen that Scientology is just a repackaged version of these things, combined with other !methods to disguise them then I likely would have run, not walked away from Scientology.

You probably already know that Scientology is a harmful fraud if you are reading my blog or have read many of these posts. But you may make a different misstep or mistake by limiting the kinds of people that could exist in your own mind. 

Sometimes it's a good thing that people are not just what we are already aware of and sometimes it's a bad thing, but it definitely happens enough to be worth knowing. 



Note: here is a link to my blog archive by topic which has almost all my older posts at the blog sorted into categories for your convenience.

I am going to include links to several articles at Mockingbird's Nest blog on Scientology that have either been quoted in this post, or that expand on the topics introduced here.




Thought Reform/Influence






Brainwashing: Standard Tech In Scientology

Hypnosis and Covert Persuasion












Scientology Reflections (5) 10 Years After Leaving-More Types of People